Why I Don't Like Blogging

I have tried to figure out why exactly I lack motivation to transfer my thoughts from my head into this blog. And I think I figured out a large reason why.

My friends are scattered all across the world. Even those I am close in proximity to, the crazy pace of everyone’s lives often makes it feel like we are miles away. I miss these people so much. My life is full of wise, insightful, funny people who have much to offer to my life. Some of those people I see occasionally, run into at the gym or grocery store; and others I have to schedule a Skype date with after factoring in the time difference. But no matter where all these lovely people are, they all have something in common : I don’t talk to them enough!

So this great invention of blogging came about…What a good idea! Rather than having to schedule an individual conversation with each person you care about sharing life with, you can write your thoughts, and others can read them - at their convenience. They can respond/offer their two cents whenever they have the chance. It is great for a society that lives as frantically as ours does.

As I am writing, I literally imagine people that I am speaking to. Does everyone do that? Maybe it’s just me. But as I am writing, I think of these different people. People with whom I wish I was sitting with at the Java House, sipping a cappuccino and catching up. But since that is rarely possible, I resort to this. I imagine what I would say to them. I think of things I want to share with them, questions to which I want their input, stories for which I want to hear their response, etc. I write as if I was speaking to them, trying to clearly communicate what is on my mind.  So what’s the problem?

The problem is that I have no idea who is reading it.  That bothers me. I am not writing just for the sake of hearing my own thoughts. That’s why I journal. That is my own time with my brain. I wouldn’t (and don’t) put that on the internet. I want to blog because I want to converse. Even if it is a less than ideal way to do so, it is a more realistic way than scheduling a million phone dates all throughout every afternoon. But I realized that the reason I stopped blogging was because it felt like pouring my heart out to a brick wall. No one is listening! No one is responding! What’s the point?

So that is where I am. I know blogging is the new “cool girl” thing to do. Everyone wants to start a blog and everyone tries to be wittier than the other. It makes people feel legitimate. Like if they put their thoughts on the internet, that magically makes them important.

I don’t think that. I truly don’t think my thoughts are anything special. I am not going to edit my blog posts for hours trying to make them sound perfect. But I do want to share life in some way with people that I love. It just simply is not worth doing if it is just skimmed, and then the window is closed.  It has to be a two-way street. If you read my blog, I want to know! I want to know what you think! Otherwise I feel like a selfish, conversation hog. Anyone who knows me knows that that is the last thing I want to be!

So…what do you think? Is it worth it? Will you join me? If you read - will you tell me, respond somehow, comment, ask a question, share a story, share a thought, challenge something I said, any/all of the above? If so....please let me know if I should take the time to write again. :)